Happy Mother’s Day

Motherhood

IMG_2761.jpg

I won’t lie. Growing up, Mother’s Day was just an excuse to get to go out for lunch after church and give my mom an extra hug or two. As I got older, it became another holiday where I had to buy yet another gift. Fast forward to today, and I think I finally understand and appreciate the privilege it is to celebrate this day.

I was in church last weekend when the pastor asked all of the moms to raise their hand to acknowledge them. I didn’t raise my hand because I thought, “do people even consider me a mom yet?” Instantly, my husband leaned over and (loudly) whispered, “why didn’t you raise your hand?!” I laughed it off, but he was right. I’ve had one person refer to me as a “mom-to-be” during this pregnancy, and I must admit, I’m not fond of the term. I am a mom. Even though this girl still has a few weeks to cook in there, I’ve already taken on the role of being her mother. I’ve gone through hours of training during my childbirth & breastfeeding classes, I’ve had to make big decisions regarding her well-being, I’ve had to make sacrifices and put her before myself – things a mother does for her child.

So this Mother’s Day is for me.

It’s also for the mothers with children in heaven. For the women who are trying to conceive. For the women who only got the chance to know their child’s heartbeat. For the women who may not “officially” be mothers, but raised children as if they were their own.

Mother’s Day belongs to you too.

I hope that you feel that and believe it as much as I do. And I hope you are celebrated today and everyday, because you are remarkable. Happy Mother’s Day, mommas.

 

Bumpdate: Second Trimester

Motherhood

IMG_2030.jpg

I found out that it’s true what they say. The second trimester is indeed the “honeymoon” stage of the pregnancy. Physically, I didn’t have many symptoms at all. Some minor dizziness and hilarious moments we’ll attribute to pregnancy brain. But emotionally, I was all over the place. The mood swings from the first trimester continued and possibly multiplied. This could also be due to the fact that I was in the midst of planning a wedding and figuring out a move, but that’s a separate blog post to come later!

I was all over the place emotionally because I was going back and forth between feeling happy and fortunate to be pregnant with every kick and roll I felt, and feeling embarrassed by the many stares and remarks from others about my size. I know I’ve touched on this here before, but to reiterate, being pregnant is hard! Growing a human is hard! The world needs to cut pregnant women some slack. There is so much pressure to look good, have a perfect basketball-shaped belly, and be a “fit mom”, even before you’ve delivered your child. I can’t tell you how many people made comments about how I look like I’m “about to pop”, and I have to awkwardly respond that I still have 2.5 months to go! It definitely took a toll on me for a little there. By 25 weeks, I had already gained about 20 pounds. It wasn’t at all what I imagined when I pictured being pregnant, but I’ve accepted it. I’ve accepted the stretch marks, the chunky cheeks, and the fact that I’ll have my work cut out for me when I get back into the gym this fall. And that’s okay! Because at least for right now, I can continue enjoying feeling my little girl tumble around my tummy (and an extra donut with sprinkles!)

10 Pregnancy Symptoms I Never Expected

Motherhood

giphy (1).gif

Maybe it’s because I wasn’t well-versed in the pregnancy/parenthood/baby universe, but I can definitely admit that I was NOT prepared for the (mostly gross) symptoms I would encounter throughout the course of pregnancy. Thankfully, the internet exists and I could verify that these were in fact “normal”, or I’d probably be convinced I was carrying a baby alien…

*Don’t read on if you’re squeamish*

1. Constipation

giphy (13).gif

It’s gross, I warned you. But this had to be number one, because it was the most unexpected and the most annoying of all the symptoms.

2. Bloating/Gas

giphy (2)

By the end of the day, your baby bump has grown 2x the size, depending on what you’ve had to eat. And by the morning, it’ll be back to it’s normal size! And then there’s the uncontrollable passing of gas. On the bright side, you’ll never feel more comfortable around your partner than during this time!

3. Insecurities

giphy (3).gif

If you’re anything like me, you’re under the impression that you’re supposed to be glowing and having an adorable round bump you love to show off on instagram. The reality is, there will be days you hate the way you look and change your outfit 8 times before leaving the house. It’s not easy to see your body change so drastically in such a short time, but in the end, it’s worth it for the health of your little one.

4. Headaches

giphy (4).gif

Some days you wake up with a headache that sticks around for 48 hours, and some days it’s brought on by the annoying moments in life you no longer have the patience for. (See below)

5. Mood Swings

giphy (5).gif

Okay. This one I had actually heard of, but for some reason, thought I would be immune to. It’s not a myth. There were days I cried because someone I hadn’t spoken to in 10 years couldn’t make it to my wedding. Followed by days I would get irritated at my fiance for not replying to my texts fast enough while he was at work. *shrug*

6. Breast Changes

giphy (6).gif

They grow. They hurt really bad. They grow some more. Your nipples change colors. They might even start to leak.

You’ll probably hate them, then love them, then hate them again. It’s part of that body-changing process.

7. Cramps

giphy (7)

This was definitely the one thing I thought I would get to do without for 9 months, since you know, no period. Duh. Not true, though. Your uterus stretching to the size of a melon makes for some crampy times. Sigh.

8. Food Aversions

giphy (8).gif

I’d heard of food cravings, but didn’t know food aversions were a possibility! Luckily, I didn’t have too much of this. The only thing I haven’t been able to stand so far is Chinese take-out. Probably for the best, since I’m trying to eat somewhat “healthy”.

9. Dry, Itchy Skin

giphy (9).gif

Okay this one has been HORRIBLE. Your boobs and belly itch SO much. And scratching causes stretch marks. So you’re just supposed to put coconut oil on and hope for the best. WHERE IS THE PREGNANCY GLOW.

10. Tickling Feeling of Movement

giphy (10).gif

You won’t notice it at first, but in time, you realize that thing that feels like your stomach doing backflips is actually your baby. It’s a weird sensation and I didn’t expect it to tickle. But I did come to love it and I’ll gladly endure all of the bad symptoms to keep experiencing this one.

Bumpdate: First Trimester

Motherhood

Week 8.jpg

If you’re reading this, it’s because I made it through one of the darkest and scariest times of a woman’s life-the first trimester. (Dun dun duuuuun). Let me take you back to the moment I found out I was pregnant. I had been on birth control for 6+ years and my fiancé and I were not planning to start a family for at least another 2 years.  So to say I was “surprised” is an understatement. I went through the typical stages post-peeing on a stick time: shock at those two life-altering lines, panic of how I’m going to have a baby and plan a wedding at the same time, and then the inevitable excitement of becoming a “mommy”. All of this followed by rapid google searching, since of course, I realized I had no idea what I was doing. The google searching ended up being a HORRIBLE idea. I read story to story of miscarriages, MISSED miscarriages, blighted ovums (WHAT), etc. By the end of the day, I was convinced something terrible was going to happen to my baby.

It’s a scary thing to be growing a tiny human inside of you not be able to peek in and make sure little one is doing okay. I was forced to breathe, stay positive, remind myself to trust my body, and most importantly- stay off baby forums. I remember thinking “how can I care about something so much, that I didn’t even realize I wanted more than a few weeks ago?” Needless to say, I was relieved when I hit the glorious 12 week mark. Of course, the worrying didn’t completely stop then, but it was a milestone I was happy to cross, as the chances of something going wrong decreased significantly. For the most part, 12 weeks also marked the end of the less-than-enjoyable symptoms that come along with pregnancy: nausea, fatigue, constipation, etc. I finally felt that I could relax and start to enjoy the wonders of pregnancy, as I entered what people refer to as the “honeymoon” stage- the second trimester.